Some paintings

Not sure where this came from. Except maybe out of pure helplessness and frustration. For some reason I could not pick up the camera. I shot three rolls today. I am feeling a bit better about it all. The paintings really help me express more right now.

Some quick Images

Thank you Sumru, for your input. It helps so much. I have asked for an extension.

crap shoot

Hey guys, I am having some serious thoughts here and I wanted to share and see what you guys had to say about it.
I am sitting here trying to get a paper done and its not happening. I am still pretty sick, even though I am in my second trimester. I am feeling like I can not do this and maybe I should stop for the semester. I dont know what to do. My second mailing is due on sunday and I do not feel prepared. I also have to meet with my AT during the weekend and right now I have no images to show. I have actually done some paintings instead.
I guess I just am questioning how I am going to do this and get through this. I am so distracted and my body just wont let me do anything. Honeslty, the last thing I want to do is stop what I want to do but I feel like everytime I go to get omething done, I dont feel good or something gets in my way.
I am going to try and ask for another extension for this mailing like I did the last one, but I am not sure how much it helps. I am so effing tired all the time. I cant help but feel really depressed right now. You're thoughts would help.

ezra where are you at?

A good Film

Hey guys, if you haven't already seen the film on Andy Goldsworthy called Rivers and Tides, I definatly recommend it. Especially for the sculptors, its a refreshing view on another artist. I saw his work once at the MET. Its fantastic stuff.

I hope you are all doing well. I dont know about you but this is the hardest semester yet. I dont know how I am making it through, but somehow I am getting through it, slowly, very slowly. Now new work yet. Just lots of writing, sketching and ideas. To much effing VC work to even think straight. Good stuff though.

My belly is growing and growing. I cant stop looking at it. It keeps changing shape and form. I am not longer sick, just quick in the morning then its over. The cravings have begun and I just had some coke, it was so delicious, haha. I keep wondering how this physical transofrmation is going to meld into my images. I dont know yet. My artist teacher wants images and I have none. The pressure to produce is frusterating. There are times where producing just doesnt happen and it shouldnt because it will. The pressure feels unessecary and pushes me away from the work.
How are the VCs going??
Michelle is hard as nails. I am afraid I will be doing too much revision this semester.

no idea what i'm doing

this is my most recent thing. any advice is appreciated!

example of new work
24x36
collage and oil

any of you have ideas for books on IDENTITY POLITICS trying to come up with readings for my second mailing maybe some of you have dived into this realm. My work is changing I am painting more figures exploring personas to begin to tell family stories doing series ten for each persona nurse (mom) union organizer(dad) baker father just begun the nurse series going well building collage painting into them also exploring heritage like Dianna mentioned similar I think we both have Native American my Grandma was Shawnee so yeah just finished a paper on Silence the book by John Cage it was very helpful in returning to a way of thinking that allows for chance opperations to happen in my work have to still write on many of his compositions I listened to due Monday whole week of writing takes me so long really trying to push myself or I am being pushed but it feels like a good direction ramble ramble brain is a scrambled from tryin to find meanin in the universal screamin get along little doggies I'm a loosin my mind makin art this way can only make ya crazy yoldle yay ye ooooo

OMG, Diana!

how wonderful to see your baby's image! how far along are you now? are you in your 2nd trimester?

what are you writing about this semester? I just turned in my first mailing on the beginning of the book Relational Aesthetics. I'm really excited for my second mailing research which is Susan Sontag's Illness as Metaphor; and Aids and its Metaphors, along with Intra Venus by Hannah Wilke and TBD book about Nan Goldin.

I've been reworking some of my videos from last semester which I began originally just to make them ready to be put on my Vimeo website with my last semester videos. I haven't met with my AT, Mary Patten (a video artist and activist), yet but we have one scheduled for tomorrow, finally.

How about you? who is your AT? have you met with them yet? do you know what you are going to make? what kind of feedback did you get about your photos at the residency... I know you only had a couple crits and the review.

I'm still struggling with understanding what they asked me to do and or not do. anyone feel like they know what is expected of them?

hope you are all well. miss you!
c

First Baby Image

Hey Guys, Leah reminded me to post this photo to share with you so here it is....our first image of the baby.

I still dont have any new work to show. I have been trudging through my first mailing this entire time and being sick as a dog.
I feel better now and am trying to catch up.
Next week is time to shoot lots of film. :)